Real Woman Don't Make Tarts

I have spent all afternoon making, assembling and now baking, a Ham, Watercress and Tomato Tart.
Never again.
When I read the recipe it tingled my taste buds but little did I realise what an almighty pain in the neck constructing it would be.

First of all the pastry.
Oh the pastry.
The nightmare of many a fine cook.
It was a simple plain flour and marge mix but with added cheese, egg, water and polenta, something I've not used before. The recipe said it would make the pastry crispy. I'll let you know....
To ward off shrinkage I let it rest then rolled it out filled the tin then rested it again. Each time bits of flying pastry landing on the floor. What matter? The floor is a positive zoo of bacteria anyway. Let it lie there. The cat jumped out of the way though having never seen polenta pastry. Polenta? Hmmm sounds like placenta. I digress.

Now to the rolling out and fitting in tin. What a palava. My tin wasn't big enough so I found another one which ought to do the trick. Anyway we, thats Hairy Suit and myself rolled the blasted pastry out using a glass spaghetti pot. (My rolling pin having died very recently). We persevered finally nailing the pastry into the oblong tin and placing it back into the fridge for another 30 minutes.
Blah blah oh dear.
Time passed..
Then it was blind baked for ages. The wretched thing never looking cooked so I kept adding a few more minutes until FINALLY I got so cheesed off with it I loaded it with ham, tomato and watercress, poured over it a 4 egg and full fat milk custard then with steady hands gently loaded the little beast into a hot oven. Where it had better cook up great otherwise I'll throw another tantrum.

Let you know the outcome later.